This list of must-haves was posted to Facebook by one of my dearest friends Karin Wertheim.
Karin writes: I often find myself recommending my favorite parenting books to parent friends of mine. Today I wrote an annotated bibliography for a friend, and thought I might as well share it with everybody.
Just so you’re aware, I did the attachment parenting thing (co-sleeping, breastfeeding and carrying the kid in a sling as opposed to a stroller, working part time instead of full time, etc.), so the books I’ve read and agree with are generally in that vein.
Karin Wertheim’s list of favorite parenting books:
_The Baby Book_ by Sears & Sears
Mike and I are big fans of attachment parenting, which the Sears family are big proponents of, but we also found that if something isn’t working for you OR your baby OR your family in general, then you need to find an alternative that does. This covers the first two years of life, it’s best used as a reference for specific issues and has a terrific index. (That’s the librarian in me talking. ;) )
_The No-Cry Sleep Solution_ by Elizabeth Pantley
This is a great sleep book written by a parent, not a doctor, who needed to find a better solution for her kids than “let them cry it out.” Lots of great background info on sleep patterns, naps, helpful routines AND the phases they go through as they get older.
_ Becoming The Parent You Want To Be: A Sourcebook of Strategies For the First Five Years_ aka “The Hippie Parenting Book” ;) by Laura Davis and Janis Keyser
Written in very friendly, accessible language, this compassionate book addresses not only concrete issues like child development, difficult behavior and family dynamics but also the emotional side of being a parent – that you are growing as a parent as your child grows. (Five and a half years down the road into being a parent, I can say that this is absolutely true for me.) This is the first and only book where I’ve read that sometimes, your kid goes through a stage where they do something you don’t like, and you can be doing all the right things to encourage them to stop, and they don’t, but they do eventually grow out of it. That was really validating for me.
_Growing A Girl: Seven Strategies for Raising a Strong, Spirited Daughter_ by Dr. Barbara Mackoff
If you want to raise a daughter who is strong and loves herself instead of being who the culture tells her to be, this is the book for you. I love this book and refer to it a LOT, not just for specific tips but for inspiration. Mackoff is a psychologist and the passionate parent of a daughter herself who couldn’t find the parenting book she wanted, so she wrote it herself. I am REALLY glad she did.
_Great Books For Girls_ by Kathleen Odean
Annotated bibliography of over 600 books with strong female characters designed to “inspire, challenge, and nurture” girls. There are a lot of crappy kids’ books out there, this will help you separate the wheat from the chaff. (There’s also a _Great Books For Boys_ by the same author with the same goal.)
_Touchpoints_ (series) by Dr. T. Berry Brazelton
Written by a really good mainstream pediatrician; provides a plain language overview of developmental milestones. I like how he emphasizes that there is a very wide range of what is “normal.”
_The Power of Play_ by David Elkind, PhD
A terrific read about why it’s incredibly important for kids to have lots of unstructured play time (with themselves, others and you) instead of being scheduled to death with lessons and anesthetized by tv and video games. (Not that I have any strong opinions about this myself… ;) )
_The Epidemic: The Rot of American Culture, Absentee and Permissive Parenting, and the Resultant Plague of Joyless, Selfish Children_ by Robert Shaw, M.D.
As you can guess from the title, not exactly the feel-good read of the year, but definitely worth reading. I felt it was important for me to read because my daughter will be dealing with a lot of these children (and the author is right, they are very easy to spot once you know the signs) and I do NOT want her to turn into one. Good lesson from this book: acquaint yourself with what is normal behavior for your child’s age and know when to get support if things are starting to go south.
_A Mind at a Time_ by Mel Levine, M.D.
This is more for parents of school-age kids. I’m only halfway through it, but I *LOVE* it. The author is a pediatrician specializing in children’s learning and this book is an exhaustive but very readable catalog of all the systems inside the brain (attention, memory, motor control, social thinking, etc), the difficulties that kids can have with them, and how to support the kids who have those particular difficulties. Favorite thing: emphasizes how kids are called upon to excel in EVERYTHING during school in a way they never will in real life and how hard that can be, and how to help your child emphasize her strengths and support her in her challenges.
_Guarding The Moon: A Mother’s First Year_ by Francesca Lia Block
By one of my favorite fiction authors, about the joys and darkness of the first year of being a mother.
